Ouch

that hurt...
i was looking forward to spending at least one day with you beside me...
now i know that's not going to happen....

Good and Bad....(uncompleted)

today :

P.A Day!
our performance.....was okay....
till the last part where i got so tired that i nearly fell for the last turn...
managed to cover up...
haha..

how do i label today??
both good and bad i guess...

Good...

went down to PJ at 9.30am..
after practice...11.30am...
walked down to domino's with K,G and C...
saw BB boys pass by...
guess who?
lol
i'm not obsessed...
by pass him twice and i could feel my cheeks go bright red..
i could have sworn that he sensed it...
*darn it*
than...
I was sitting down with some friends...
than something happened and i got up quite fast and the timing was so great...
=.=
i knocked HZ's sis, JQ and she ended up sitting on her friend.....
i laughed non-stop....
=.=

Bad...
I got pissed off at C...
i forgotten something and she didn't give me a break...
at all...
crap her
only she can forget bout things and no1 gives her a crap bout it??
than....
i nearly fell on G during the last turn during our performance...
i hope no1 noticed....
>.<

ouch..that hurt....

I'll hate you for that...

but you know i can't for long..

you're forever in my hate list..

you're on my friends list too....

how could you??

i should have gotten used to this...

you're an idiot...

you're one of my idiots from my gang...

I'm confused right now...
all I want is a care-free life..
why don't you leave me alone when you become one of them??
big-headed jerk..

___________________________________________________________________

I'm sorry...

Exams = OVER!!!

exams...are over...
so why do i feel down??
not going to school tomorrow..
teachers' day...
*whispers* sleep in only..
The P.A performance...is coming along i guess....
last two practices...
i would NOT tell you what song we're going to be dancing to...
lol

crap...
i think i might have to stop talking to you...
it's going to hurt me alot but...
wait...
i won't tell why here...
you want to know why don't you just contact me straight...
ha
if you could...

can't wait for Monday!!!
oh that reminds me that A has not informed me yet if she's going....
=.=
nvm...we'll drag WM...
and i'm going to figure out a way to get someone in the water...
meeting at 9.30-10am at starbucks kay.
don't want to go on a wild goose chase please...

P.A day is coming!!!
not ready!!not ready!!!
hate pink...
but have to wear pink...
*makes a face*
i wanted to wear a dark colour!!!
nvm nvm...
hz...
only one day....
one time...
its okay
lol!
going mad adi..
should go..
bye bye
tata!!

xoxo
.:'Xhe Yi':.

mid-year exams....

Exams now....
somehow got online...
haha...
the guys in my class are really really entertaining....
especially during exams!!
lol

i still remember on tuesday when we had our add math paper...
even thought the papers was still on our desks...
the whole class was yapping away!!
explanation : they gave up on the paper and turned their attention to their friends....

tonight..
we went out for dinner with my parent's uni friends....
i was so damn bored....
my sis entertained herself with the nintendo ds...
while being the "good girl" i am..(*cough cough*) i absent minded-ly listened to them talk and bully D...haha that was the only time that i found interesting...

someone is online...
but his status is on busy..
so i shouldn't disturb him...
because he's having exams too...

oh oh!
did i tell you people that there is the carnival this year??
well...
i heard from others...
my friends and i (in my class) plan to set up a ghost house!!
i won't tell what we're going to do...
but we promise we'll try to make it the scariest one that you'll never forget!!
i'm also planning on inviting someone...
but not sure if he can come...
from what i heard....
it on July 5th..

next monday..
we have...
History where we'll all be history...
tuesday...
science...
thats okay...
plus too more lousy subjects...

yeah...
i think thats all....
goodnight people!!
lol
i'm going to be online till as late as i want...
muahahahahaha
*innocent smile*
tata!!
xoxo

.:'Xhe Yi':.

Madly Madly Madly

I'm wondering...
why am I telling you all this??
it's funny how things can turn out....
no matter...
you're a good friend...
=]

Okay.....
The main reason i chose that topic....
is because....
i admit....
i'm crazy about someone....
but....
i don't think he feels the same....
i don't know....
anyway....
will be seeing him soon!! ^^,
don't get me wrong...
not obsessed....
just excited....
like when i'm excited in meeting.........................
okay scratch that....
like when i'm going dancing...
done....
sheesh...
but dancing is fun....
you should try it sometime!!
lol
it's not as easy as it looks like!!!
i mean you actuall have to pay atten......
*whispers to self*
okay girl....you're going out of point....
LOL
okay...i'm like really hyper now...
and it's only 11..
the night's still young...
but since i'm like....timed on this comp...
and not to mention...
too young to go clubbing....
i'm stuck at home and have to off this comp than go study...
or maybe not!!maybe i'll just non-stop sms someone till i sleep!!
^^,
tata!!!
xoxo

.:*Xhe Yi*:.

Mid-Year Exam!!!

Mid-Year exam!!
ouch....
my head is starting to ache...
add math....
acc....
econs....
study study study...

blah

Kor's in Genting...
D came home....

I want to go to Genting....
=(

tomorrow presentation for one of the projects...
I fell like deleting my blog link...
There's nothing to do around here...
Very very very boring.......

wrapping up the whole day..lol

today....
Saturday..
school....
=.=
went to school....
double boring....
my class = 47 people...
attendance for the day?
15 people...
wheeee...
R & LX wrote extra big bout LK...
hz...
SY & V now know bout the crazy crush I have on you.....
=.=
thanks alot R & LX...
I didn't need it....=.=

After school which was like at 12.35pm....
Started walking home...
yes I walk home under the crazy freeking blazing hot sun...
He didn't come.....
luckily....
If not it would have been dead obvious about the crush issue...

Went home.....
quickly ate lunch and bathed....
and immediately got into the car and drove down to PJ...
was helping K out with worship...
piano!!
oh oh and this guy was chosen by one of our friends to help out with drums.....
gosh....
he's LOUD!!
I could barely hear the piano and it was like maximum!!
lol but his drumming was cool..
according to G, he's grade 8 in drumming..
and blah blah blah...
yeah we somehow managed to pull off worship nicely...
haha...
then....we went for group discussions...
pioneers didn't have a leader or a room....
so we kinda just crashed the seniors room...
it was so freeking hot so I went to sit under the fan...
then C joined me....
then K....
then G...
ended up talking on the floor under the fan! haha!

then blah blah blah....
oh!!
after dismissal, HZ appeared!!
yay!!
(typing bout him...he suddenly come online lol)
So long never see him around...
but as the shy person I am (riiittteee) I didn't even dare to say hi...
=.=
K was like...."go talk to him lah!!!!"
me : dun wan lah....after like so awkward lah....
she gave up..

went home...
had dinner....
now online
haha kinda wraps up the whole day....
kinda...
=]
byee...
tata...
xoxo

.:*Xhe Yi*:.

22nd April

Oo I'm mean...
lol but the pic is nice..
look at the background!!!

lol my kor and I...(i look so weird lol!)

this is even weirder...

kor took the camera........=.=
 one of my earliest presents!!!

thanks kor!!!

little bits of me...

ohhh crap....
it hurts.....
alot....
fcuk...
gonna hurt till end of this week i think....
just now texted kor....
he didn't reply till later...but i fell asleep....
i texted wern too....
but she was busy with homework...
so...
yes...i cried alone...
and fell asleep....
have to go there again either tomorrow....or on the 23rd...
*sigh* damn sad wei...
can't eat japanese on thursday....

it hurts like crap!!
and i cried again when i found out i can't eat...
i miss D...
i still remember him going off for his plane over and over again....
as i hugged him...
i prayed that he would be safe throughout the journey...
i held back my tears when he said "bye and happy birthday"...
so of course he won't be around when i turn 16....
like he wasn't around when i turned 15...
after i got into the car and watched him walk towards the airport...
i realized that a tear had fallen....
i was so glad it was dark and M won't be able to see that i was crying...

mixed up into one.....

hmm....
just found out about quite a number of things....

annnyyywwaaayyy....
since i'm online till a certain time i shall not say....
i thought of posting something....
but....
i might cause war...
so i'm not going to expose the whole story...

someone didn't come to school today....
class was so quiet...
haha!!
well....

except for the usual noisy gang behind there.....

i don't get what's the big deal....
you're with him...
i'm no longer...
so what?
and i just found out that C reads my blog......
=.="
talk bout a bit awkward....
*thinks mental note to self*
haha
just joking...
it doesn't bother me that you read my blog..
it doesn't bother me that you're with her...
much...
but i'll get over it...
besides....
lots off cute guys out there...
lol
and i already have one or two that caught my attention...
*hint hint*
lol...i'm bad...
but....good girls are girls that never get caught!

thinking of you..

and here i am...
thinking of you...
thinking what we could be....
but unsure if that would ever happen....
maybe it could...
but not to me...

I'm already upset that you're going to the camp...
and i can't...
*sigh*
i want to go!!
all my friends are going to leave me behind....
again....
darn it!!

c.o.n.f.l.i.c.t.s......

conflicts....

love...

arguments....

misunderstandings....

all add up to....

trouble...

Random Mixing....

One week passed....
let's see....
tomorrow is Seafield's sports day...
(not going...so don't bother)
tomorrow is also JNY's birthday...
happy 16..
to JNY (if you ever read this) : haha soak under the hot hot sun for your birthday!!lol.
kay kay...

than.....
today plans canceled with kor cause M wanted to spend some "quality time"....
went to SP and mostly walked around....
got yogurt ice-cream....
saw D's eyes go from bored--->shock when he found out how much the ice-creams were...
*whispers : not cheap kay!!*

today during recess......
anyone reading this...and i mean EVERYONE....don't get angry after you read it....
i was siting there kind of staring at all of them....
asking myself...
why am i here??
in the end i kind of gave up....
got up and walked away....
i don't know why i did it..
but i just felt like i didn't belong there....

when the bell rang...
i walked to the ONLY stairs that was open...and bumped into C...
i kind of lost my balance...
luckily Wern and Ai Lin i think....were coming towards the stairs...
i followed them up to my class...

than went blah blah blah....
he came to my class....who knows for what reason....
yes he came....
not alone though....
luckily i sit in the middle of the class.....
luckily i had me friends to be there with me at that time....

recent happenings....

10th April 2009

FRIDAY!!!
went to school...
blah blah blah blah...
oh yeah...
but yeah there's that whole other story...
in school there's 3 girls involved...+ 1 guy..
A & C like 'boy'...
'boy' like A's friend, B
A is willing to let B take 'boy' because she thinks its just a crush...
in doing so..she says she doesn't have any feelings anymore for 'boy'.
but B doesn't like 'boy' or so she claims...
A & B doesn't even know who C is...
but there are rumors that there is a girl in class that like 'boy'.
thaaaaaannnnnnnnnn........
girl A also likes someone that she's never seen for a long time...
but she also thinks that that is also another crush....
and that person probably already has girl already...
too complicated??
that's what's happening so far...
you may or may not know who is A & C and the two guys...
don't burst my bubble so fast...
unless the two guys themselves answer to this post.... =)

Than after school...
had tuition...
it rained heavily and stopped just when it was time to go...
tuition went on...
than ended at 5.35pm..

than....
at night...
went to church...
at 7.15 cause performing...
last min practice in the church hall...
service started at 8pm...
after service...
went home...oh yeah..only with D cuz M and elf stayed at home..
cuz elf had school the next day...

11 April 2009

This morning...
went for cantata practice...
yes...
in church..
again....
than....at 12.15pm practice ended...
was called upstairs to the office...
had to fix all the service papers...
wrong date...........
inserting extra infos.....
than...went home around 1.30pm....

after lunch..
cleaned up my room....
it looks so much better!!!lol
you can actually see empty spaces in the shelves!!!haha
i finished around 5.45pm...
yes...that's a very very long time....
especially when i started at 2.45pm...

Than...
later around 6.30pm....
went out to a restaurant with a weird name...haha

NOW...
I'm online...
just finished sivik research...
and moral project...
talking with C...
I can sort of handle thinking bout him with that girl now...
i think...
at least i don't think i'll break down in school if i saw him and her again...
annyyyywwwaaaaayyyyy....
waiting for kor to come online again...
he said he go gym....
which closes at 10pm....
but so far he not yet online also...=.=
so yeah...
sign-ing off now..
tata!!
sayornara!!(if thats how u spell it haha)

I'm pissed off at myself...

I can't belive I'm that easily.....
'disturbed' if that's the word for it...
I'm supposed to be OVER you by now...
but when I saw you with HER....
i freaked...
It's been four months....
and you've gotten yourself involved with another girl already?!?
who the hell are you!?!
I saw you walking out with her like you walk out with me last time...
I nearly cried...
I'm not afraid to admit that...
but it's annoying that i'm still not over you...
fcuk..

Sorry to Disappoint

I never thought that YOU would be one of THEM...
I thought YOU were different...
now i know....

YOU are exactly like THEM.

you both were my best friends and my sisters...
but now....i think things are changing a lot...
one would always go down during recess when last time she would normally company me in the library if i had too much work....
but now....she prefer going downstairs with V & A...
than.....the other one....hz...
she prefers the "inner-livelier" part of the group...
not that i would blame her or anything...i mean i would too...
but...to sum things up..
i'm the only one in the "gang" that went to arts instead of science...
I find that now when i "mix"with the "gang"....they talk about science stuff....
yeah i know you're in pure and sub...but hello...not all your conversations revolve around status..
right???
why separate me from you??
how different am i?
if you're in pure science....so what?
it doesn't mean you're smarter than the sub-science and arts students....
okay fine....in a way yeah you know more stuff...
but...aren't we the same??
sheesh...the way i see it...
it's like...there's this huge gigantic gap in between the pure, sub, and arts...

i'm sorry to those that came here to my blog
just to find a very angry,emo post....
but this is only half of what i'm going through...

Forget It...fullstop...the end...

I'm sitting here in front of the laptop...
just wondering what to type....
Should I expose what I'm thinking?
Or should I just say I'm good?
I don't want you to know that you've hurt me...
more than in a way..
But......as I sit here and think what to really let out...
I think of you and wonder if you'll know it's really you that I mean...
Do you miss me?
Do you even care that I'm gone???
What if I didn't exist today?
What would the world have been like?

oh...yes...the Paws thing...
I'm disappointed that they won't except volunteers on weekends...
I'm not free during weekdays for goodness sake!!!!
The place closes in half an hour time....
still waiting for SOMEONE to reply my messages so to tell what to do....
but....yeah.....
she's too addicted to "maple story"...*sigh*

In the night I hear your voice...
talking sweetly in my ear...
telling me it's alright and that you'll always be with me...
that....didn't happen...again.....
forget it....
It will be this way....
Forget it...

....tagged.......by Jin Onn......hz....

random pic...

1st Tag
Directions : Once you've been tagged, you have to write a post with sixteen random things, habits or goals about you. At the end, choose five people to be tagged, listing their names and why you chose them. Don't forget to leave a comment (''You're tagged!'') and to read your blog, you can't tag the person who tagged you. Since you can't tag me, let me know when you've posted your blog, so I can see your weirdness.

1. I aim to study at Aus in 3&1/2 years time
2. I hate myself xP
3. I love myself xD
4. I think that I look a little like Wern last time lol
5. I'm gonna try getting a volunteer job at Paws
6. I love ice-cream!!!!!!
7. Did you know that sugar actually makes you age faster?!?!? =O
8. My economics skills are horrible
9. I have no idea why I'm doing this tag....
10. I envy those people that wear dresses and look better than i do haha!!!
11. I'M FREAKING too random....but my friends love me for it!!!lol
12. I like going to Aus....especially Melbourne....
13. I like guys that can play the guitar and sing.. *hint hint* lol
14. I'm happy I have many friends that will be there for me
15. I can't think of anything to type in right now.....
16. I'm not sure if I want to do a tag anymore!!!haha

2nd tag
Direction: List 5 things that has something to do with you

1. 5 things you love the most
- Family
- My Pet sibs
- Ice-cream!( Choco-Mint please..... )
- My handphone
- My music

2. 5 things you hate the most
- When I hate myslf.........
- Big headed jerks that only care for how they look
- Guys that put games before their friends....especially their gfs.
- Alcoholics
- Sex maniacs

3. 5 things beside u
- My handphone
- Chair
- Pillows
- Main phone
- Mum's art work...........

4. 5 babes you love the most (added : y can't it be guys???)
*changing question for some girl's sake*
4. 5 guys you love the most
- D
- My bro =)
- A specific guy...... *looks around*
- Jesse McCartney
- Any guy that can make me fall in love xD (nothing to type adi)

5. 5 things you need the most
- Family
- Friends
- My handphone
- Music around me
- Intenet connection

Kay...I finished my tag..... I tag.......um....
- Kor
- Wern
- Est
- Siew
- Denise